by Tom Chillemi –
Why does Friday seem to take so long to arrive, but the weekend goes by so quickly?
And, have you ever noticed that it seems to take longer to get some place that you really want to be, like the Rivah; while the trip home seems to go much quicker?
These are conflicts of “here” and “there”— problems caused by anticipating goals, be they good or bad.
“There” is the goal, where you want to be. “Here” is where you are.
The “here and there conflict” is also evident in time goals — “now and then.” For instance, Friday or vacation comes so slow, and your time “there” is over too fast.
“There” always seems to be further away than it is, especially when you really anticipate getting there.
Hold the thoughts
Even if “there” is good, after you’ve been “there” for a while it begins to feel like “here,” then it’s time to go “there,” again.
The cycle doesn’t end unless you make it stop. And some people are only happy a short time “here,” then they want to be “there”—until they are there—then it’s time to again go somewhere . . . anywhere. Let me out of here!
This cycle springs from the hope that things will be better “there.” And they will be, for a while. Then it’s time to go. Again.
Even dogs want to go “there,” and make the daily rounds and socialize. In nature, movement is necessary to find food and to stay alive. And from the way humans have created excuses to move around, it’s still essential to our lives. How many forms of entertainment involve movement? Just about all of them.
Finding contentment
It’s almost impossible to just sit on a front porch and enjoy the view, if something is bothering you. You can’t enjoy being “here” if your mind is “there.”
It’s easier to stay on the porch if you want less. Chasing more of everything wears you down. The farther you look for happiness outside of yourself, the farther away it is.
Life is a series of goals. It seems we’re always working towards the next thing— making the team, graduating from school, getting married, buying a house, having children, working towards retirement.
It’s good to have something to look forward to, so long as the future doesn’t invade the present.
Remember, if you anticipate the future too much you ruin the chance to enjoy the moment — the here and now. You will get so excited you can’t sit still. And, then it’s goodbye to the front porch.
Commitments
Have you ever known people who, when you’re trying to talk to them, look like they’re some place else. They’re not “here” in their mind; they’re already “there,” working towards a goal, wanting that goal to be completed.